Friday, February 20, 2009

I heart red wine and running!

Seriously, it totally makes everything better.

So yeah, today was totally craptacular.

My advisor, out of the blue, says to me "So you need to have three papers out to graduate."

To which I respond (in my head) WTF?!!!!!

Hello! Before I took the job in Seattle we discussed this and what milestones I needed to accomplish. And in my head, the goal was to have two papers out before I left in April. I am making good progress on one, and March will be devoted to the other.

But now! A third! Which I am going to have to pull out of my ass!

To all you non-academicians, I'm not talking about a paper like you write for a class. I'm talking paper that needs to be submitted to a journal and peer reviewed so you can't submit some half-assed piece of work!

So yeah, now I have 150% of the work I thought I had to do before I blow this joint. And yeah, did you know I really only have 6 weeks left in Ames? After over 5 years here, my time here is dwindling fast. I was at the point where I was a bit stressed with what I had to do, but I had my head around it. I had a productive work week so I was actually feeling pretty good.

But then I got blindsided by this. Let me note that he has never required that any of this other students get 3 papers out before they leave.

And did I mention I will be on a boat for the entire month of April? And then at a field station for all of May and June? And that I have to defend my mid-July to graduate this summer? Who has time for this shit?!

Anyway, this cast a bit of a pallor over the rest of my day.

So I decided to blow out of my office at 4pm and go home and run, since it was over 30 degrees. I am finally upping my mileage a little and I had a glorious 7+ mile run. It was dark and I was totally unsafe and not running with reflective gear and totally running on dark country roads. But only a few cars passed me, so it was all good. I couldn't see my HRM so I just had to listen to it beep when I was running too hard or I was being lazy. My run wasn't superfast (7.25 miles in 1:20), but it wasn't supposed to be fast, but an easy run. Of course, I have a half-marathon in a month and I am still only up to 7 miles, but I have been doing "long" runs twice a week or so, so I figure that has to count for something.

Well anyway this is my favorite route in Ames. It is the route I randomly ran the first Thanksgiving I was here and I hated the world because not a single person asked me if I had Thanksgiving plans so I spent Thanksgiving alone and I hated Iowa to death (you people aren't as nice as you seem to think you are) and I decided to just run this loop that I didn't even know where it went or how long it was and it turned out to be a good 7 miles and it was the first time I ever ran more than 6.

Anyway, then I came home, took a hot shower (stretching in the shower, new favorite thing!) and ate leftover mashed potatoes and cracked open a Cab from the Columbia Valley. When I was in NZ mode, I was all about drinking NZ wines, so now that I am in Seattle mode, it is all about the WA wines.

Anyway, my day sucked, but now endorphins + alcohol == superawesome!

I may have to remove this post tomorrow...


Wendy said...


But yay for running & beverages!

Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...

Anyway, my day sucked, but now endorphins + alcohol == superawesome!

Double equals! Now I KNOW you're a scientist*, because only a REAL scientist would know about the super-secret 'double-equals'!

Nice scam you tried there: Getting out of writing peer-reviewed papers by getting yourself killed running in the dark without reflective gear. What makes you think academic responsibilities end with death? Man, for a scientist, you're naive!

Because if you'd done your homework, Ms. Scientist, you'd know that Iowa's State slogan == (double-equals) "Corn and d*ckish citizens: That's all we grow here in Iowa!"

(I like to think of myself as living proof that not ALL d*ckish citizens live in Iowa, though.)

Good luck with the papers, sister! (Can't one of 'em be a photo spread? Seems only fair ...)

*Unlike that fake-o library "scientist" whom you let crash your blog! THAT'S RIGHT!!1! I said "WHOM"!!1!

frog said...

So, if I say whom, does that make me a scientist?
Whom to you then, double-whom, even.

Danielle, if you think working something about Marcel Proust into your third paper would help, then I have tons of peer-review-worthy stuff for you.

Sorry about the wicked advisor. Any chance he had you confused with someone else??


Audrey said...

DUDE, that is insane! LIke seriouSLY almost not possible. Wow. I take back all mashed potato comments I made. i think you should eat those exclusively.

Duane said...

A really hot chick that loves mashed potatoes and stretching in a hot shower, I think I need to take a cold shower!

Lisa said...

What!! That is insane!? I'm 1.5 years out of my phd now and I've get to see my SECOND paper in print. I call bullshit.

I wonder if you can just sneak out the door by getting done whatever gets done, and then just telling your advisor, "Well, the new job starts next month, so...." I feel like only an asshole would not let you go, and your boss doesn't sound like an asshole.

Or, you know, you could just burst into tears in his office. Seriously. Three papers!? I am incensed by this.

Lisa said...

And will now pour myself a glass of wine.

Ryan said...

I love alcohol and I love endorphins...Wonder if I can put endorphins in the alcohol and make life a little easier?

Rainmaker said...

I'm still perplexed on how your comments ended up with people eating mashed potatoes in the shower. Very confusing.

Dr. Iron TriFeist :) said...

I'm with Lisa. I call bullshit. Sure, there is an understanding in academia that a PhD should have 3 papers worth of data but publishing is a different story. Unless there is some written university requirement requiring 3 papers, he can't hold you back. Talk to your committee and your college's academic advisor about that. You have a job in the works, for heavens sake.

jeanne said...

I love mashed potatoes.

All I can say is: I hope your damn degree doesn't interfere with our half-mary plans!

Brent Buckner said...

That blindside sucks.

You now have another Valuable Life Lesson: document agreed milestones in e-mail recaps after meetings. Ensures you're all on the same page, and may be used as evidence later....